Surgeon Opinion

We met with my kidney surgeon today. As my oncologist warned might happen, and we suspect will concur with, the surgeon wants to wait three months to see if this mysterious spot really is growing / really is cancer. For now it is of no immediate danger and is too small to spread yet if it is cancer. And... maybe it isn't? Maybe...... :-/

Removing the new nodule by "freezing it, cooking it, or cutting it out" (oi vey!), presents too much risk of possibly damaging my only kidney, than the threat this 1cm nodule poses at this point, by leaving it alone and watching it to see if it changes or not, and if so how quickly. He said that the possibility of metastisis from the first cancer, since it was massively huge (15.5 cm as opposed to this one which is 1cm - and we KNOW that the first one definitely spread to my lung before) is still a more likely threat, than is this new spot on my other kidney for now. Kidney cancer can spread up to 15 years after the first occurrence. There is no statute of limitations. The lung spots, if they are cancer, would be mets from the first tumor 4.5 years ago, not from this new kidney nodule, and the lung nodules are not growing at all right now. So, we wait, and see what all these things look like in 3 months. MAYBE the lung and kidney nodules are all cancer or maybe they are not .... we just don't know yet. SIGH.

I know God wants me to learn to just trust HIM for the future and stop trying to control everything!!!! :-( He is giving me the message loud and clear that I just have to WAIT and TRUST that whatever the future holds; I am not in charge of it. He is.

For many years when I saw the "Serenity Prayer" I just didn't GET IT . Now I know that I need to read it over and over all day long! Please pray I will learn to just rest in God's control and not my own.

"God, Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference."

Thank you for praying for me. I certainly need it!